From Home and Back, our Ukraine adoption journey.: Blog

School has started now

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 20:10:09 GMT

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and our days are mostly spent with just Kole and I. I am enjoying it and so is he. However we are so very happy when Kelsey gets off the bus as well as the other kids.

Kelsey has started with basketball practice as well. Kole has started pre-school for the 2nd year, last week.

He loves it, however I still have to stay for a few minutes before I can leave. He is ok with it, but he doesn't want me to be in a rush to leave either. I think its because he likes me to see how big he is. He is in a small group again this year only 6, which is great.

I'll try to post some recent pictures of the kids.

I also found a blog of a family in Kirovograd adopting a sibling set of 3. I hope to email them, the little girl and boy look very familiar. I'll have to go look through my pictures to see if I can find them. I have been lucky enough to have a picture of another little boy that was adopted about 6 months after we left. The family loved having the pictures of him as well.

I hope all is well.

Kelsey and Kole at the creek this summer.

Kole at the creek

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Where do I start?

Sun, 10 Aug 2008 01:56:37 GMT

Well, as you can tell by reading the last post, we were just a day away from Kole's surgery. Kole's surgery was performed and well done. He did great. He ended up having a double inguinal hernia and he was pleasantly surprised that he would have two scars like Daddy.

He was funny after having given the happy juice before they took him back...

After the doctor examined him, he was still quite loopy. The doctor laughed at him and said buddy, if you were in a bar we would have to cut you off. To which Kole replied, after being examined, You gonna cut it off????? He was very worried. Much to the doctors dismay he quickly scooped him up and gave him a hug and assured Kole that he was not going to cut any thing off.

The night before he snuck into the kitchen and got a drink about 1:30 am. I explained to him that the doctor said nothing to eat or drink after midnight. He very matter of factly said to me, 'Well Jesus says I can have a drink of water.' Kind of hard to argue with him about that one isn't it?

The surgery was on an outpatient basis and it was done on Thursday. By Monday morning he was telling me that he was hurting much more than he had been before, so I began giving him his pain medicine again. He threw up, much to his dismay and he didn't know what all that was about. He wouldn't eat anything all day. He went to sleep about 7:30 Monday night and woke up at 11:00 pm screaming in pain and doubled over. After a call to the doctor and some ibuprofen we decided to take him to the ER. He would not walk, he kept screaming and could not have any clothes on anywhere near his surgery sites.

When we got to the ER, we told them that the doctor told us to come in, we waited a bit and they called us back. After the triage nurse took a quick look at him, she made sure to stress to us not to let him have anything to eat or drink, absoultely nothing and assured us that Kole was now their priority case above anyone else in the waiting room. Kind of scary. By this time he was much calmer and not screaming as long as I carried him.

When we got back to the examining room, we were told by 2 nurses and 2 doctors not to let him eat or drink anything at all. They gave him some pain meds and then sent us to ultrasound to make sure he didn't have a torsion going on. It took 4 adults to hold him down with him screaming bloody murder and I must admit that I was crying as well. All looked well by ultrasound and he did not have a torsion, but it was suspect that the hernia had reoccured. Back to our exam room we went where they inserted and IV and started giving him pain meds and morphine for his pain and admitted us. We were there for two days. It was decided that he had been a bit overly active and it had caused some internal bleeding, which pooled south and caused EXTREME pain for our little man. So, all we could do was wait and his body would reabsorb the blood. In the mean time they kept him on IV pain meds and morphine to keep him comfortable.

He is still a bit on the cranky side, but getting better. The swelling has continued to go down and his bruising is fading a lot. Hopefull his crankiness will subside too.

Talk to you soon

Kole has his surgery tomorrow.

Wed, 30 Jul 2008 17:19:29 GMT

I'm starting to get a bit nervous about it. I know it has to be done, but I worry. I worry because I am his Mommy. All he knows at this point is we are going to the hospital in the morning and the doctor will give him one scar like his Daddy's. Anything that he can have like his Daddy is cool with him.

So please say a prayer for a save and great outcome to Kole's surgery tomorrow. Also tha Tad's blood work comes back clean of cancer on August 6.

Thanks

Sorry for the interruption.

Sun, 20 Jul 2008 18:45:41 GMT

Its amazing at how fast the time does seem to fly and how quickly you become busy, especially in the summertime.

We are all doing well here. Kelsey and Kole are now finished with their ball, and they both did very well. Kelsey did better than well. She was oustanding. I just love watching that girl play ball.

The summer seems to have flown by and it will only be a few short weeks before school starts.

Tad is doing well and will have more blood tests at the end of this month. Kelsey is doing well and growing. Kole will have to have surgery for a hernia on the 31st of this month, nothing serious, but it does need to be taken care of.

I am staying busy with my babysitting duties. We have been having fun this summer. We spend our days playing in the creek or going to the pool to try and keep cool. All the kids seem to love it and I love watching them as they explore.

Next week we plan on 'exploring' the river, as my kids call it. I love to watch them as they find someting new. Any new fossil, intresting rock, a turtle, a frog, and even crawdads, which I must say are very hard to catch. Its great to watch the expression and wonder on all of their faces.

Kole continues to show no fear when it comes to the water. He is now doing front flips off the diving board, much to everyones delight at the pool and gets lots of cheers and clapping when he does so. Which he does love.

More next time.

What are you thankful for?

Wed, 21 May 2008 17:11:11 GMT

This will be the first in a series.

What are you thankful for is a question that is running around rampant in the blog sphere, and it truly got me thinking. There are so many things that I am thankful for and no, I won't list them all. Instead I'm going to be telling you about the people I'm thankful for, what they have meant to me and why.

Today I am going to star with my husband, Tad. My Aunt recently said to me how she never in a million years that I would be with someone like Tad. I was a bit taken aback by her statement. It was not said with any malicousness at all. But it did make me stop and think. I personally could not see my life without him. He makes me laugh so much and we have a lot of fun and some great discussions. I love hearing his insight and his opinions lately, especially when it comes to politiics. I really enjoyed telling her why I loved him.

Our house is always full of laughter! He is a constant source of amusement for lots of my family members and has been 'affectionaly' termed as 'Cousin Eddie", for his uncanny ability to come off as the goofy character in Chevy Chases's Vacation Movies. You can always count on him to give a good laugh, cause a good laugh, or to get a good laugh out of anything. He never hesitates to lend a hand, in fact one of his earlier concerns after finding out that he had cancer was to make sure our neighbor had enough wood before he had surgery, and to get things done and have supplies on hand, to make it easier for me and Kelsey,to do the chores that he usually does.

When we started dating, he knew that there was no way anyone would come between me and my daughter, Kelsey. In the beginning of my 'dating, after separating days' I dated a few people other than Tad, none of which I would consider having them be a part of my daughters life. In fact the first time he met my daughter, and we werent dating, she had a runny nose and he simply took out his hankie and had her blow her nose. I know that doesn't seem significant to anyone else, but for some reason it was to me.

My Papa, who I'll tell you about more later, because I am so thankful for him too, was a quiet man. It wasn't until I was a high schooler that I understood that he was not of 'my blood'. In fact a family member had a question, when a cousin was expecting, about how he would feel to have his first grandchild. I sat back shocked that a question like that was even posed to him, for he never treated any of us as 'less' than his family. From my Dad and my Uncle having him as their father, to all of us as his children, there was never a question of his love for any of us...

The point is, that Tad is the same way. There was no doubt that he had love for Kelsey, as any father would. He took us as his family, without question, without hesitation and smiling the whole time as well.

He always encourages me and I have never ever heard him put me down. When I ask him a question and ask him to answer it honestly, he does. He gives me his opinion on things, but he ultimately lets me make my decision and stands beside me after its made. He makes breakfast, which I don't like to do, on the weekends. Even though he works hard there are still times that he comes home and fixes dinner and more often than not he is the one that cleans up afterwards, if I have to give Kole a bath, or just spend some 'girl' time with Kelsey.

He is one of Kelsey's biggest cheerleaders at her softball and basketball games. He helps Kelsey with her math homework. He seems to sense when Kelsey and I need our girl time. So he and Kole go do something while we go do our thing as well.

He is the one who makes sure we go to church, because quite frankly I would be sorely tempted to just sleep in. Which, by the way on a lot of Saturday's he makes sure that Kole stays quiet and shuts the door so that I can do so.

Our motto, after finding out that he had cancer, is 'you and me'. Its the first thing I said to him after the doctor closed the door and left us alone in the room.

I have no doubt that when we are old and wrinkled that we will be sitting in rocking chairs on our front porch, laughing and talking about old times, good times and how blessed we have been in our lives.

My husband, is one person among many of who I am thankful for. But the thing that I love the most, is that just about every day, every day.....

He still asks me to marry him.

What a beutiful Saturday...

Sat, 10 May 2008 16:31:36 GMT

We have been enjoying watching the Big East Conference for the past three days. UofL Ladies Softball is awesome. As well as the other teams. We have been able to watch Kelsey and her friends enjoying the game and meeting all those great softball players. However watching it in person is GREAT!!! TV does not do this justice. Those girls can play now.

She was also able to meet the Uof L head coach and talked about the summer camp that they have going on as well.

The weather has been very rainy here and has canceled a few games this week, which was actually nice. I am getting caught up on laundry today and doing other things that have needed to be done as well.

Tad has gone back to work and I must say that Kole has certainly missed him and so have I. I had a mini vacation while he was home, but it sure is nice that he is back to work, financially that is.

We are currently planning our summer vacations and we can't wait.

We hope your all doing well and I'll try and do better about updating soon.

I'm sorry that it has been so long since I'ave updated...

Sun, 20 Apr 2008 19:06:02 GMT

Things are going well here. Tad has done very well with his surgery and returns to the doctor this week and hopefully he will return to work soon

Ball season is in full swing now. Not only is Kelsey playing, but this is Kole's first year of playing as well. Of course, he keeps saying he is going to do it all just like Kelsey. He is going to hit the ball far far away, just like Kelsey. He is going to slide just like Kelsey and he has. But the best part is when he got to come out in the catchers gear just like Kelsey.

Not only did Kole love it, but Kelsey got to see for herself how much her brother thinks of her, first hand. Kelsey is Kole's hero. So, we are busy at lease 3-4 days a week with ball games and practice now and I'm not sure how I'll keep up with other things once Tad goes back to work. I must admit it has been nice having him here and he has gotten to see how my days are full with all the kids.

Kelsey is doing great in school and softball. This year in ball its a whole new set of rules and we are all getting used to them, especially Kelsey.

I must tell you all what Kole is singing as I'm typing this, it goes like this....

Twinkle Twinkle Lilttle Star how I like to ride in your car.

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, pick your toys up where you are.

He is always good for a gigle. Until next time.

Kristi

Oncology

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 15:56:35 GMT

oncology

Definition: (on-KOL-o-gee) Oncology is the branch of medicine that deals with tumors, including study of their development, diagnosis, treatment, and prevention. This includes most cancers. An oncologist (on-KOL-o-jist) is a doctor who specializes in oncology.

I know it sounds silly saying this now, after the fact, but I've had this post mulling around in my brain for a few days.

Tad did well during his surgery and they removed the whole prostate. The doctor said he didn't think that it had gone outside of his prostate, but we would still need to wait for the pathologists results on Thursday at his appointment. I can't tell you the sense of relief that I had after speaking to the doctor after his surgery. However that relief was short lived after I found out that I would not be able to see Tad until he was in his room for nearly over 3 hours. I simply needed to see him, to be able to touch him and kiss him to know that he was alright. So I waited and made phone calls and then recover called and said that they were moving him to his room and we decided to meet him there.

As I came off the elevator on the floor that he would be saying the above is what I saw, Oncology Floor. Somehow it kind of shocked me, to see that he was on the oncology floor. Yes, I know that he was diagnosed with cancer, but actually seeing that he was admitted to the onocology ward was like a kick to the gut. I took a few moments for this to digest and yes I know it sounds wierd.

I decided to wait outside the elevators, you know to shorten the wait time for me. I was relieved when those elevators finally opened to reveal my husband and what does he say to me? 'There she is, where are my glasses I can't see a darn thing.' Finally at this point all my nervousness, anxiety, worries or what ever you want to call it simply melted to the floor and I felt so muich better.

He was suppposed to have been sent home on Friday, but we finally made it home on Sunday afternoon and it felt so good to sleep in my bed. Right now he is doing well, just a bit uncomfortable. He has an appoinment later this week for a cystogram and if all is well then they will remove his cathater, which we both look forward to.

So, thank you all for your thoughts and prayers and please keep them coming.

A Funny from Kole

Wed, 20 Feb 2008 16:21:05 GMT

Yesterday as we were driving Kole insisted that he needed to call his Daddy on the cell phone. The following is his side of the conversation.

Of course Tad was on the speaker phone. Keep in mind that Tad doesn't really catch on too quickly to Kole speak. Yes, Kole does a great job of speaking, so yes that means that Tad needs to listen a little more intently.

Daddy, you need get new tires for you tuck(truck).

Tad: Yes buddy I'm working on the track.

Kole: No Daddy, you need get new tires for you tuck.

Tad: Yes buddy I'm working on the track.

Kole: No Daddy! You need get new tires for you tuck.

Here is where I interject and translate for Tad, who is a little slow - or hard of hearing

ME: Tad, Kole says you need to get new tires for your truck.

Tad: Oh, yeah buddy probably so.

Kole: Daddy you need get new tires for you tuck so you go faster.

Tad: Yes buddy I'm working on the track

I interject again

ME: No Tad, Kole says you need new tires for your truck, so your truck can go faster.

Kole: Yeah Daddy new tires go faster.

Tad: Oh yeah buddy do you think so?

Kole: Yeah and higher up too.

Tad: What buddy?

My interjecting again.

ME: He says that you need new tires for your truck so you'll go faster and your truck will be higher in the air.

Kole: Yeah Daddy go higher and faster.

Tad: Yeah buddy I'm working on the tracks.

LOL I laugh every time I have to listen to Tad on the speaker phone talking to Kole. It's quite funny.

As I said Kole speaks very well, there are only a few instances where your not quite sure what he says, but he makes sure that you get it. Thank goodness for Tad that I can translate huh?

Cancer update:

Tad has surgery March 13. After that it will be about a week until we get the results to see if the cancer has spread outside of the prostate. Please keep praying that it is contained to the prostate. The doctors say that Tad's chances are great that it will not come back. Which is comforting. Please keep praying.

It seems like more and more people are being affected by cancer.

Tue, 05 Feb 2008 14:19:46 GMT

More and more so every day, or at least that's the way it seems to me. I fully believe that it is because that there have been so many advances in medicine that more and more cancers are being detected earlier. Thank Goodness that Tad's has been detected early. It is unheard of that some one Tad's age is even found to have prostate cancer. Most men aren't even checked until they are 50-years-old.

So, I do believe that God had a hand in it. I do believe that early detection is the key. So, as a PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT to all!!

Go get your yearly exams, both men and women, including mammograms. Early detection is the key, even though there is not a cure for cancer yet.

On another note, Hopeful Hearts (who helped with our adoption) is having their yearly benefit this weekend. This is the first one that Tad and I will be able to attend. I have helped with the flower arrangements for the past 2 years, and this year will be the same in addition to actually going. For those of you that do not know I do have a link to the Hopeful Hearts web page and I do request that you spend some time perusing their site, please make sure that you watch their videos. They are simply heart breaking and really shows the need in Ukraine and shows how Hopeful Hearts is steping in to fill in the gap to help these wonderful children, who otherwise are lost souls. (Not to mention that we are breifly shown in one of the videos while we were in Kiev with Kole)

I would also like to encourage you to give to help the cause., no matter the amount. A little goes a long way over there. One year we were able to buy a bed for one of those beautiful children at a very small cost. There have been several who have given in Kole's name and our family name, will you please consider giving too? Here is the link to Hopeful Hearts.

Until next time ~~ Kristi

Stage II cancer

Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:39:27 GMT

is what Tad has. His prostate cancer is at stage II and he has a Gleason score of 6. His options for treatment are radiation or surgery.

I must say that we have had appointments with two out of three doctors so far and the patientce and the time that they have spent with us has simply been amazing. Teh radiation oncologist spent over 2.5 hours with us alone. He made sure that he explained everything in great detail with us and he did not rush us one bit. He did not push radiation treatments over surgery at all. Right now Tad is 95% sure that he is going with the surgery. We meet with the surgeon on Friday to discuss the surgery and he fully expects to leave there with an appointment for surgery.

As Kelsey says 'I just want it out and gone Daddy.' That is the sentiment that we all share right now. As she simply stated, we can't help but feel that it needs to be gotten out. Which also leaves an additional treatment for him should it come back in the future.

Cancer is a scary word anyway and when it ends up being your husband its even scarier. But as Tad and I keep saying to each other 'Me and you!'

Meaning that no matter what happens its the two of us going through this. So every doctors appointment, every conversation, every discussion about treatments its Me and him.

I'll update more after Friday.

What do you do when the world as you know it drops out from under your feet?

Wed, 23 Jan 2008 02:31:08 GMT

Tad and I went in to the doctors appointment today prepared to hear that the biopsy results were positive. I am so glad we had that mind set, it really helped when indeed the doctor said that the results indicated that he does indeed have cancer. I must say I am so impressed with this doctor. He spent over an hour talking to us alone, when he had a waiting room full of patients and I do mean full. He rushed not one bit, he took his time and answered all of our questions. Not to mention that he has a great sense of humor about him.

So now on Tuesday Tad has to go for a bone scan and a CT scan to find exactly where his cancer is, how big it is and to see if it has spread elsewhere in his body. After that we take those results to two different appointments. One is an oncologist to discuss radiology and the other is a surgeon to discuss removal. Based on that info then we will decide how we want to proceed. So keep those prayers coming.

Tad and I were talking this evening how its funny that God has a plan, and how he continues to show is His plan. If we had gotten pregnant and had a child not only would we not have Kole, but Tad would have never found out his testosterone was low and then they would have never done a PSA test. I highly encourage all you readers to insist that the men in your lives have a simple little blood test called a PSA done (Prostate Specific Antigen). Most men routinely have one done in their 50's. Tad is only 37. So see, God really does have a plan in all of this.

So insist on PSA test for all your loved ones. This is our public service announcement to you dear readers. I'll update more on Tuesday.

Love to all~~ T, K, K, & K

Today is the day...

Tue, 22 Jan 2008 16:04:03 GMT

We find out the results of the biopsy today.

The waiting game has begun.

Mon, 14 Jan 2008 01:07:02 GMT

The biopsy has been done, now we wait - some more. We go back to the doctor on the 22nd. Please continue to pray.

Thanks

Prayers and Positive Thoughts are needed again please.

Fri, 04 Jan 2008 18:45:34 GMT

Yet again we face the possibility of cancer rearing its ugly head. We will know more on Tuesday when we meet with the doctor, but until then please keep our family in your thoughts and prayers.

Thanks!

Wow, what a Christmas!

Fri, 28 Dec 2007 15:51:13 GMT

What a wonderful Christmas we had here. It was so good to be with family! To think that last year we celebrated by having a pizza party at our apartment with the two other American couples that were also adopting from 'our' orphanage.

Unfortunately Mamaw and Nick were not here in person to celebrate with us and I must admit that I did shed a tear, but I sure could feel them with us. It's been a tough year with the losses of our three loved ones this year.

Kole really got into Santa this year. After going to sit on Santa's knee he told him he wanted a choo choo, as we were walking away he stopped me and with a very concerned look on his face he asked where his choo choo was. I told him that Santa was going to bring it on Tuesday. However even more importantly we got to share with him the real reason of Christmas, that baby Jesus was born and we celebrate his birthday.

A cute little Koleism: Sometimes I forget that Kole takes things literally. He was asked if he wanted to be a sheep during the church play. He looked at Ms. Nancy and said NO! It was only later that he realized and after I asked him if he wanted to pretend to be a sheep. Of course he did and he played his speaking part very well too.

Things between Kelsey and Kole have gotten so much better. She was really feeling left out with all the talk about Kole's first Christmas and she was really showing her hurt feeling towards Kole. After a big blow up I had a talk with her and I explained to her that this was his first Christmas, and she too had a first Christmas and we all talked about it as well, the only difference was that she was too little to remember it. After a long discussion she has certainly changed the way she interacts with him now too.

So I hope you all had a great Christmas too.

Today, one year ago we laid our eyes and our hands

Thu, 13 Dec 2007 17:41:38 GMT

It is so hard to believe that one year ago today we laid our eyes and our hands on our little guy for the very first time. Tad nor I had the sense about us to grab the camera for our fist meeting. The two of us were simply awestruck at the little miracle that came walking through the door. It took all I could do not to cry and not to run to him and hold him, but I did it.

They brought in this little guy who was scared and crying and when he seen strangers he really let his disapproval and fear be known to all within ear shot. I went to him anyway and held him. He wrapped his warm little arms around my neck, I felt his slight weight and felt his breath against my neck and oh how he trembled. He grabbed a handfull of hair and my heart and held on and would not let go. I think he must have been woken from a nap before he came to us. His little body was warm and I just inhaled the scent of Kole.

It was in that instant that I knew that I had my question answered. Could I really love a child that was not of body like one that was? Absolutely. He was ours. He was in my heart before I even met him.

It was only when we went to court to becomes his parents that we found out that another couple from Ukraine decided that they did not want him, due to his first reaction of them. That thought just shocked me. Had they been patient and understanding my what a gift they would have gotten. In the next instant I was so glad that they weren't patient and understanding, because their failure to be that way was just the beginning for our family and my oh my how blessed we truly are.

One year ago today we got our first glimpse

Tue, 11 Dec 2007 14:38:35 GMT

One year ago today, we got our first glimpse of the little boy that would become our son. My what a day that was. It feels like yesterday, but yet it also feels like it has been so long ago too.

The changes that this little boy has made are simply astouding when I think on it. The first few weeks were simply horrible, horrible, horrible. I questioned our decision as to what we had done, but at that time I really needed to put myself in his shoes. The following is for those families we are getting ready to adopt or on their way home with their little ones: Unless your a saint and have the patience of Job, which I thought I did by the way - the patience that is, the first little bit will be very trying on everyone involved. Just remember that your child is grieving. They are grieving the loss of everything they had every known and everything that was familiar to them. They are thrust into a world that they have no real concept of. There will probably be a language barrier as well. He would cry and throw fits and I would cry as well.

See, Kole walked around asking for his buddy Kata for several weeks. He would hold out his hands in askance and say "Kata? No Kata", with his little lip stuck out. See, Kata was his buddy. She was a little down syndrome girl from his groupa and the two were quite fond of each other. It would break my heart so we would get out our photo albums. He would look at Kata and his caregivers as well as the other kids in his groupa and jabber someting I didn't understand, very excitedly, but over time I think he forgot. We will still pick up those albums and look through them. He no longer jabbers excitedly, but he lingers over those pictures particularly as if trying to search grasp a string of memory, it breaks my heart too. We did get to see Kole and Kata interact with each other and you could see how much they loved one another as well. There is still a bit of jealousy between the siblings, only because so much fuss is being made over Kole's first Christmas. I had to remind sis that she too had a first Christmas, only she was a baby and not 3 so she didn't remember it.

We were repeatedly told six months will be the magic time frame when things start to fall into place and to just hold on until then and pray. Those wise people were so right. As time went on things gradually started to fall into place, not only with Kole, but with Me, Tad and Kelsey as well, not to mention the rest of the family. Now here we sit a year later and those first few horrible weeks are a long distant memory. It as if Kole has always been a part of our lives and that we never missed a day of his. But it also seems like just yesterday that we seen his picture for the first time.

Which also leaves me to remember those other four little boys, at whose pictures that we looked at so intently ~Igore, Serhi, K---, and Ivan. I still think of them a lot and I hope and pray that they have found their forever families as well. (If by chance anyone out there has adopted any little boys in the 2 year range with those names, please let me know. I hope and pray for them.)

Right now as I speak Kole is busy playing cars with his little buddy Hannah. He makes sure that she has a toy to play with, he makes sure that she is always close by, he makes sure that she has her coat on and her shoes if we leave, he makes sure that she has enough to eat and is always willing to offer her some of his foot, he is always watching after her as well....... just like he did with Kata.

So those of you who are beginning your process, keep the faith and the hope and always have the love. Every part of our journey has been worth it, even those very difficult first few months. Oh, and don't put much stock in to the pictures at the SDA, they are very outdated and are not a true representation of what your child will look like when you do see them. Examples are below:

Picture at the SDA Picture after we met him at the orphanage Picture in October of 2007.

11 Months, nearing one year

Sat, 01 Dec 2007 05:23:23 GMT

It has been eleven months that Kole has been 'ours'.

I have just spent time reading our blog from the time that we we left Louisville to today, talk about a walk back in time. It was like a movie running through my mind as I read what I had written. I cannot believe the changes that have been made to our little family all four of us have grown in so many ways. That trip was truly a gift, not just because of Kole but because it made Tad and I realize the things that we take for granted. I for one realize that it does not matter if you buy Christmas. That is in no way what Christmas is about. It's not about the gifts that you buy, but its about the time that you spend, not even necessarily the time that you spend, but the quality of that time.

This Christmas is going to be so different on so many levels. This is our first Christmas as a family of four. This is Kole's first Christmas period. This is my families first Christmas without Mama and Nick and man, I can't tell you how hard it is just to think about that. Even though we were not there in person, we were there by phone. I cannot tell you how much money we spent to get minutes on Galya's cell phone, just to talk to everyone that we possibly could on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

I remember that when I called Mama and she answered the phone I said "Merry Christmas" and she was so suprised that it was me on the other end. She worried about het cost and I assured her that it was worth every single penny.

Pops died earlier this month and I didn't want Kole to go to the funeral, because I wasn't sure that I could make him understand why Pop would not wake up. He was crazy about Pops! After the funeral and as we pulled into the subdivision to go to Mama and Pop's house he got all excited and asked if we were going to see Pop. I tried as best as I could without getting too 'wordy' and the conversation went something like this...

Me: "Pop does not live in the house anymore."

Kole: "Why:

Me: "Because Pops died and he went to heaven to live with God."

I watched his face as he processed this information.

Kole: said "Why?"

Me "Because we had our turn with Pops and now it is God's turn."

Kole: "Oh!!"

He seemed to take it all in stride, I don't think that he really understood the concept of dying, but he did understand that now its God's turn.

~~~~~~~

Can you tell that we have been working on sharing and taking turns around here?

We had Kole evaluated, just to see where he stood and what we really needed to concentrate on. The summary of the evaluation was that he was behind in language, but nothing that they would really consider a problem, considering he is just learning English. He scored at a 2 years and 6 months on his language, but everything else was right on and a little above. However some of his comprehension and all of his coping skills he scored at a 5-8 year-old level!!!!!! Can you tell that I am bragging?

I'll update more later on....

Pity Pity, poor pitiful me!!

Tue, 27 Nov 2007 19:08:46 GMT

I can just kick myself seriously!!

We have not recovered finacially yet from our adoption, then DH was caught not wearing his hard hat so he was sent home for two weeks without pay and there have been tons of doctors visits for everyone in the house which is $35 a pop, so about 1500.00 in the last few months, with more doctors visits to come. All necessary. DH had surgery last week and was off one day without pay again. Again, totally necessary.

I am just a bit down in the dumps of knowing that I am not going to have the $$ to get my kids great gifts, especiallyl since its Kole's first Christmas with us. Kelsey keeps saying she wants this and she wants that. I had a talk with her and explained to her about the situation and she seemed to understand. I think its me that is having the harder time with it though.

I take two other boys to preschool with Kole and I asked them what they wanted for Christmas C said he wanted trains and tracks, P said he wanted transformers and when I asked Kole what he wanted (knowing that he didn't understand what it all means) He made my heart melt when he told me Mommy! Today I again asked what they wanted Santa to bring them and the C and P went through the toys they wanted and again when I asked Kole he said My Home. Then I wonder if he really does get it.

We missed Christmas last year with our family. (I think another reason I am bumbed is that this is the first Christmas since Mamaw and step grandfather Nick deaths, so this will really be my second year not having them with us on Christmas.) So that this will be the second year for us, not being together for Christmas!

So today my goal is to drag out my photo albums (all 5 of them) from our trip to Ukraine during Christams last year. Just to remind myself of how blessed we are. So that I can look at all of those beautiful faces of those kidos in the orphanage who don't have what we will have this Christmas. What Kole has this Christmas!

That and enjoy our inheritance from Mamaw and Pops - Star their little pomeranian dog. I love it when she curls up beside me on the couch or chair, just like she used to do to them and it makes me think of hugs from them both too.

Too much......

Tue, 20 Nov 2007 17:20:06 GMT

I simply do not see how some parents do it and to be quite frank, I won't do it. Nothing against those parents that do, hey if they have the energy then by all means, have at it!

I am constantly amazed at how many children there are that are 'in' so many different things. How do those parents do it all, really? From ballet, to piano, to sports (basketball, softball, soccer, baseball), to swimming, art lessons, karate, scouts ... the list could go on, really!! And they do it while working.

As a child, I did not do all these things. Sure, we were on the swim team and we did school sports, but never more than one at a time and I hold to that belief and I stick to it myself. Kelsey wanted to do basketball this year and soccer, and I told her that no, she could not do so, that she had to choose one or the other and she did make her choice. She was happy with it and so was I.

I am in the less is more category, because if I did all those things above, when would I have time to have some down time with my child? To sit at the kitchen table and talk and ask about how their day went? How school is going? To have a great conversation with my child and find out who they are becoming to be as a person.

You may ask where this came from? It was just a conversation that I was having with Kole's pre-school teacher. We were talking about how many things that children were into now and how hard it was to grow up in this generation. Her final thought was 'Why not put a blanket over the table to make a tent and get out a flash light and actually play with the child. The children of today are just growing up way too fast. They need to be children. Amen!!!!

Ten Months have gone by

Fri, 02 Nov 2007 23:08:37 GMT

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and my what changes we have seen in our family and not just Kole.

If you didn't know, you wouldn't know.

These pictures were taken just a couple of days ago. Enjoy!

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Boxes upon boxes upon boxes....

Mon, 29 Oct 2007 13:19:46 GMT

Its that time of year again when people start filling shoe boxes to ship overseas to give to children as Christmas presents. Operation Christmas Child is underway!

Some of you may have heard this story and if you have well, please take the time to read it again...

Galya took Tad and I to a church service, on what would have been Christmas Eve for us. There was standing room only and I do mean standing room. I felt as if we were all stuffed in that building like sardines. As normal after the first little bit the children were released to go to Childrens service. Did I mention that the service was nearly four hours long? NO I am not kidding! Anyway when the children did come back in they climbed upon the laps of their parents or their babushkas and they were holding these shoe boxes, I instantly recognized the ribbon that was wrapped around them, it was fromm Samaritans purse (www.samaritanspurse.org). These children were so excited as they tried to peek into their boxes. I could tell how hard it was for them to contain themselves, but Oh the look of joy and excitement on their faces is something that I will never forget! I decided right then and there that every year I would do this. I had done shoe boxes before, but to be honest they really didn't hold much meaning to me. I never gave it a second thought to where they ended up and to whose hands they landed in. To many of the children, these were the only thing they would have gotten for Christmas.

Did you know that UKraine is the destination for 568,213 of these boxes? There are so many children around the world who take joy in these boxes and learn about the Lord along the way.

So please if you would, just fill one shoe box, its not a difficult task and its not expensive. So today I challenge you dear reader, please fill one shoe box for one child this year and every year after. If you have any questions contact me or go to the above website for more information., such as suggested gift items and recomendations on what not to pack as well as instructions. And if you do decide to take a shoe box and make a gift for one child please let me know by posting a comment. This is a great way to get your children involve!! Please hurry though, collection dates are from November 12-19

Nine months

Mon, 01 Oct 2007 15:58:14 GMT

On Saturday is was nine moths that we took our little boy from the orphanage forever. It has been nine months of sweat, tears, fits and love. Lots and lots of love. It is amazing how far this little boy has come in nine months. On occasionan there will be 20 steps ahead and 10 back. When we back step I have to check myself and remind myself that it has only been nine months and he is allowed to back slide a bit now and then, as any three year old would. But my how well he is doing.

We went to the annual Ukranian picnic over the weekend and got to visit with many friends and it was so good to see the kids running around and playing, and I must admit to see them throw fits and cry and be 'yucky' too. In this group of people there were no looks of 'control your child', or the look that says 'why are you holding him so that he cannot move when he is screaming?' There were no looks of distaste from others as your carrying a kicking and screaming child to the car for a time out. AHHHHHH, the relief of those who have been there and done that and know why we do what it is that we do.

Kole had his evaluation yesterday

Fri, 21 Sep 2007 13:06:02 GMT

And according to the doctor that did it he sees absolutely no delays and he is on track, of course he will send his formal evaluation when he gets done with it. He did say that he has a bit of a speech delay, which one would expect, but he makes himself understood. So today he goes for his speech evaluation.

I am so proud of him. He has come such a long way in the 9 months now that he has been ours. Wow its been nine months, two days ago, that he was declared ours. It feels like yesterday, but so long ago at the same time.

Well, its about time she spoke to me....

Sat, 25 Aug 2007 03:03:46 GMT

I've been waiting since April, perhaps I just wasn't listening before, but I heard her loud and clearly today, not only that, but I seen it too.

Before I go on, I must tell you what was spoken in the past...

Not long after Papaw passed away, Mamaw and I found ourselves with each other a lot and I do mean a lot. If she needed to go to the store, to the doctor, or if she just plainly needed and sometimes when she didn't need, we would find ourselves together. And we talked, we talked a lot about everything imaginable. However before we spent all that time together we got clues from Papaw. Now before you think I'm crazy just let me explain a bit. It was more than one occasion that my phone would ring and it would be Mamaw on the phone and after the initial Hello how are you, we would ask the other if we needed something, only to find out that neither one of us had picked up the phone to call the other. I know it sounds confusing, but I swear my phone would ring and so would hers and neither one of us would have dialed the other. After the first time I jokingly said, it must have been Papaw telling us that the other needed to talk.

As I said, this didn't happen just once, but repeatedly. This is only one example of Papaw letting us know something or sending a message to us. He still does it to me today.

Anyway, Mamaw and I would talk about it at length and how we loved having that feeling of having him around, even though he had gone. We had also promised each other that we would do the same if one of us left to go to heaven.

I had been waiting for Mamaw.

Until this morning...

Mamaw loved humming birds, loved them.

I have a hummingbird feeder on my front porch that I can watch from the window, or I'll just go outside on the porch and sit and watch. Its odd how they don't mind me being there, but if someone else comes along they scatter quickly.

So this morning as I was watching them, two of them were being quite territorial and one flew right into the window. I knew I had to rush outside and get it before the cats did.

As I held this little guy in my hand I realized how fragile it was and how scared it must be. I was showing him to Kole and explaining to him that we had to be gentle and patient with the humming bird and hold him gently in our hands, so he would know we care and love him, we needed to be kind to him until he could leave on his own, when the humming bird was ready and only then, but until then we would take care of it the best that we could and show it kindness and love until he was ready to leave

It was then, as I heard myself telling Kole that I heard Mamaw talking to me.....

You see yesterday we got the news about Pops (her husband), they could no longer offer him any treatments for his cancer and that the treatements had stopped working for him, it was again time to call hospice.

I truly don't think I have grieved for Mamaw yet, I think I just keep pushing it back, but today... Today I cried for her because I miss her so and I needed to know she was still with me. There are so many times that I have thought, Oh I need to tell Mamaw this, or tell Mamaw that.... Silly me, she already knows. Now I know she kept her promise to me, and she will continue to do so.

Please say a prayer for Pops (Nick).

Dog days of summer

Mon, 20 Aug 2007 15:29:16 GMT

The kids have started school. Kelsey is getting into the groove of things and Kole has begin pre-school for the first time. I think his teacher was a bit apprehenisve at first, I think she was afraid that she would not understand him and vice versa. She was pleasantly suprised by the second day when they worked on colors and he knew all of them but two, black and brown, those were the two that we had not worked on yet though. He loves going and he loves his back pack.

Kelsey will begin basketball practice next week and she is really looking forward to it.

It has been hot hot hot here. Up to 105, but mostly in the 90's without any rain to speak of, so things are hot and dry and the grass crunches under your feet when you walk.

I hope everyone else is keeping cool.

Time seems to fly...

Thu, 26 Jul 2007 22:05:57 GMT

I must admit that I am so glad that softball season is over. Don't get me wrong, I am so glad that Kelso is such a great player and we did have fun going to the games and going to state (her team lost out in the fourth round). We had a great time and they will be memories that will last us forever. I am very proud of Kelsey. I also have to brag and say that she alone, by herself had 5 RBI and she came across the plate twice herself. So out of one game she herself scored 7 points. I was told the other day by her coach that she was by far the most improved player of the season. At state they even rearranged the batting order so that my DD could do clean up as fourth batter. She nearly came close to another grand slam. The bases were loaded again and she hit a triple and then another triple in one game, thus the RBI's above.

But it is so nice to be home...

The kids are doing great and growing like crazy! Kelsey continues to amaze me with her maturity sometimes and she can frustate me when I forget just how young she is. I sometimes have to remind myself that she is 10 and not older than that. Of course she reminds me that she will be 11 next month every time I say that she is 10. 11???? Where did that time go? It seems like just yesterday that I went into labor with that girl. She still loves to hear stories about her and about the things that she did.

Kole is definitely a Papa's boy. He cracks me up. I love it in the mornings when he crawls in bed with me and hugs me and says 'My Mommy'. I think he has finally gotten it!! Just the other morning we were talking about the things that we love and the things that we love. Of course it was the usual people that he loves and the dogs and cats that he loves. This little boy can be quite serious at times and when he is he will gently take my face so that I am looking at him and so that he has my undivided attention. He said Mom, I like choo choo trains and I like Steve driving the tractor fast. Keep in mind that this is my translation, he hasn't quite got the full senteces just yet, but he certainly makes himself understood. He also told me that he loves riding on the choo choo tracks and going fast!! His Papa took him for a ride the other day on the tracks and he was drug kicking and screaming from the truck because he didn't want to stop!!

I am such a blessed woman. I have a wonderful husband and two beautiful healthy children, not to mention the rest of my family.

Until next time....

Just some pictures from the lake over the 4th of July....

Wed, 11 Jul 2007 03:56:41 GMT

Kole loved the water!!!

The last picture is from today... Poppie and his three boys!!

What a difference six months makes...

Wed, 11 Jul 2007 03:44:34 GMT

We had been told the following: You won't believe how much difference you will see in your child at about six months of age. All of those who told us that were right!! This little guy has grown in so many ways...

The first photo is a referral picture that we seen of him at the adoption center in December of 2006.

The second photo will be on the second time that we seen him.

The third photo will be from today.......

Kelso brag!!!!!!!!!! We are going to state Baby!!

Tue, 10 Jul 2007 15:08:04 GMT

The whole weekend was spent at the ballpark with Kelsey and her All-Star team.

Just a little pre emptive info:

Our girls play a six inning game.

On Saturday we were in the bottom of the sixth down 4-8. We are up to bat and we have two outs with bases loaded. My baby girl gets up to bat and hits a grand slam to tie the ball game!!!!!! Everyone was screaming and jumping up and down and I just wish I had my camera to have taken a picture of her after she slid into home. She had a smile a mile wide!! That game went into an extra inning to break the tie and we won by one point.

Then last night we ended up playing that same team again and we won, which made our team play another game just thirty minutes later and boy were the girls hot and tired!! We did loose that one, but the girls came in second place, which assured them a spot at the state tournament.

So now on Thursday we'll be traveling above Indy for another game.

Man is her trophy shelf getting full!! We may have to have another shelf made just for her!!

*******************

We spent the 4th of July in South Carolina at a family reunion and we had so much fun it was great getting to visit with everyone! Tad had fears about Kole being afraid of the water! Ha that was a joke. He was running and jumping in the water and even doing flips into the water by himself. He loved it when Tad would throw him into the water, by going a good 10-15 feet in the air and coming up saying More papa!

He enjoyed tubing and boat rides too.

Now I'll just have to get some pictures up won't I?

Oh and at his three year check up he had gained three pounds and grown six inches in the six months since we have had him.

No that was not a typo I did say he grew six inches!! YIKES!!

Oh my!!

Thu, 21 Jun 2007 16:10:36 GMT

Kole went for his three year check up yesterday at the doctor. I had been so concerned that he had only gained three pounds in the six months that he has been ours. I knew he had grown, but not the six inches that he had. Geez boy has that boy grown, or should I say shot up since he has been with us. I was thinking only two inches, boy was I wrong. No wonder we haven't found a comfortable position for rocking with all of his knees and elbows sticking out, its getting harder and harder to do it.

In a few short weeks my baby boy will turn three and I must admit that I am having a hard time with it. He has only been ours for six months now and it just doesn't seem like he should turn three. I guess its just another confimration that no matter how little we want them to stay they just keep right on growing huh?

He has become quite the little or should I say big man. All of the things that I used to have to help him with he now says 'no tank you Mom' and he continues to do it himself. He loves meeting new people and he loves going to Sissy's ball games and knows exactly where the park is. He gets rather upset if we do not take the left at the end of our road because he knows exactly where the park is. He is doing so great.

He has grown by leaps and bounds and I do not just mean in height. I still love to watch him as he experiences his 'firsts'.

Six inches in six months, if he keeps it up at this rate he will pass his cousins before long.

Kelsey finished up her softball season and they won the tournament and she got two trophies. I am simply amazed at this girl and her ability to play softball. She made the All-Stars team, which means more practice and more games with traveling involved in them. She is loving every minute of it. She usually plays catcher but when they need her to she is short stop and first base. She certainly didn't get this ability from me, she got it from her Dad. Heck when I was playing t-ball I got hit in the head and that was enough for me, I never played again. Kelso loves it. She has such a great team spirit and I credit her coaches for that. All of the girls get along great with each other and I am sure with the coaches that they have that the combined All-Star team will do just as well too.

At Sissy's ball game

Sun, 03 Jun 2007 23:30:12 GMT

He loves to go and watch his sissy play ball...

A great day

Sun, 03 Jun 2007 23:27:33 GMT

Playing in the sprinkler.